Sports Reporter: The “Perfect” Writing Job

Aw hell, you mean I have to cover the Superbowl again???

The Vince Lombardi Trophy.

Image via Wikipedia

Alright!!! It’s Super bowl time!!! As much as I like sports, and love football in general, being a sportswriter looks like a sweet job. I mean, look at the benefits:

You get PAID to go to games, and even the big events, like the Super Bowl

Need I say more? Covering the Super Bowl is your job. You’re there all week. You get to go almost anywhere. Now of course you have to produce something, and if it was me it would be nice and succinct:

Team A won.
Team B sucked.
Details in tomorrow’s edition.
Post-game party in ten, we’re out of here!”

You get opportunities to talk one on one with sports celebrities

How sweet can that be? You have complete freedom to ask them whatever question you want. Appropriate or not, you can ask it. You’re representing the fans, and you too want to know why the hell he swung at an inside pitch on a 3-0 count.

It seems impossible to run out of things to talk about
English: This is an image of St. Louis Rams ow...

The next game – check. The last game – check. Last game’s impact on next game – check. Last arrest – check. Getting an athlete to say something stupid – check. Asking other players to respond to stupid statement – check. Going back to the first athlete to get his response to what others said about the stupid statement check. Asking an athlete if getting asked about the statement 100 times in a row is a distraction – check. Asking an owner if he’s going to fire a coach – check. Declaring an owner’s denial as a sign he IS going to fire the coach – check.

If you’re an “insider” you can get some pretty cool cellphone numbers

You are the man! (or woman) You not only have athletes, managers, agents, and commissioner’s’ phone numbers in your contact list, you also have a more valuable group of names. Airport staff to let you know what coach just flew in, coincidently as the team is searching for a new coach. Also hotel staff, to let you know who checked in, or they saw the owner and the coach.  Also anybody on the team’s administrative staff; how else would you know a coach is scheduled to be interviewed while the team denies it.

You try to find out information before it’s announced so you can say “you heard it here first”

You, and your employer, are the smartest kids in the class. I mean, it’s not like the team was going to keep it a secret and sneak the new coach out at the very first home game for everyone to see.

You don’t have to say things about an athlete or call him a name to his face

Like any fan who can post a comment or call in to a sports show, you can call someone a bum, a thug, a cancer on the team, should be traded/cut, the weakest link on the team, etc. and not have to duck. And remember, unlike a fan… you get paid for it!

And most important of all, you’re almost never, ever, wrong!

Team goes 1-15, you predicted 15-1 season. Coach gets fired, and you now have more material than you need to write, and write, and write! To this date, as far as I know, no sports reporter has ever been fired for a team’s performance. Even better, couch your calls in a “beat the sports writer’s predictions” contest, so your bad calls becomes someone else’s season tickets.

In all seriousness, it surely seems like a fun job that does require serious work, but also seriously it’s one of the few jobs I can think of where among other responsibilities you’re paid to be a Monday morning quarterback.  Obviously, being able to write about something you enjoy is great!


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